Slacker’s Guide to Creativity

I try to post every OTHER day, but I just thought that the Universe needed some creative help. I am more than happy to oblige. Here are my suggested Guidelines: 

Step One. Enroll in a class, preferably led by a boring, monotone, burnt-out professor. Better yet, take a class that is truly a total and complete waste of your time. Perhaps it is a stupid prerequisite to something you really do want to learn about, or you are repeating Geometry because you just didn’t care the first time around, and your attitude and aptitude do not seem to be improving very much during this rerun.

Step Two. Place a note book in front of you; it should have plenty of empty pages and not be college-lined. Obtain a pen that is so fluid, that as it deposits your precious words onto paper it begs for more than these miserable class notes. In fact, this pen demands that you put it to much better use, and allow it to achieve its full potential. You have no choice but to obey and set your pen free to perform magic and deliver its message, like the planchette of a Ouija board.

Step Three. Now please pay close attention. This is the important part. Utilize the margins of your notebook to compose poetry or artwork or the outline of your novel. Stare out the window at the trees whose leaves quiver in the soft wind, and allow your mind to roam and dream and only occasionally to check in with the here and now. Pretend that the teacher is your mother, and ignore her just as you did when you were an annoying teenager. But, be sure to nod your head every so often, and open your mouth and widen your eyes as though you had just received the most brilliant piece of learning that was ever offered up in the course of human history. The teacher will appreciate your façade of rapt attention and leave you alone.

Step Four. Be at peace with yourself, because you have found the perfect place to unleash your creativity. Allow a Buddha smile to slowly spread across your face. Discover the hidden realm of the deepest, previously unmapped facets of your heart and your mind. Perhaps you will somehow actually learn something from this class, as you sit in the chair that tethers you to Earth. Or perhaps you will be back to compose more poetry next semester. Either way, it’s a win-win situation.

this was originally published on Medium 2/12/2016

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